Doorknob, Part Two

I was convinced.  Today is the day wrongs will be made right; the denial, the impasse, the forced direction would end. Today.

Once again, I removed the hinge pins from our front door. With a prybar, I forced my will against the gravity-driven weight of the massive door, and with everything inside me, I pushed.  I gained, maybe, a quarter of an inch.  Again, with heart and shoulder, I forced the hinged side of the door to budge another half-inch or so; enough to replace the hinge pins in the hinge mounted to the frame, preventing the door from regaining its usual place.  With greater force, I continued to work the door away from the frame until, with a great splintering of wood, the door was off the hinges, in my hands, while I was falling to the floor.

With great dexterity, athleticism, and grace, I fell flat on my back while cradling that cursed door against my chest.  Using my great upper body strength, I was successful in preventing the door from breaking my nose while at the same time, protecting the door from damage.  Now that I think about it, I can’t, for the life of me, remember why I needed to protect that door.  The weight of it, pounding my chest and now pinning me to the floor, was unusually heavy.  Again, with grace and dexterity, as I slid from beneath the door, it crashed to the tile floor with tremendous force.  My formerly pristine tile floor broke its fall.  

Determined and undeterred, I wrestled the door into a standing position so I could remove the last pieces of the broken door knob.  That’s when I saw that the piece that refused removal was screwed into the door with two long screws.  Now I see why it refused to budge while beating it with a hammer and chisel.  Lesson learned.

Finally free of broken hardware, I replaced the door in its welcoming hinges, bolted the deadbolt, plugged the open hole with a towel, and headed to the hardware store to purchase replacement hardware,

It only took three hours to replace the 2 bolts and 2 screws that hold the new knob in place.   Having succeeded, and with great satisfaction, I poured myself a cup of java and wiped the sweat from my eyes.  I needed to rest up- my next project?  Taking down the Christmas lights….

Life is good!

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